Aside from the glaringly obvious Constitutional issues (and the gawd-awful ’80s snark) that holding a “prayer service” on the steps of the state capitol raises, there’s another reason why the “but what harm is in it!?1!!” line of defense doesn’t much impress me. Instead of wasting his time – and Georgia’s tax dollars – imploring some invisible Sky Daddy to give up the Baby Jebus’s tears already, Gov. Perdue could have spent the day dealing with fuckers like this:
The Cobb County homeowner who guzzled his way to the top of the county residential water users list has enlisted a public relations company that made a statement Wednesday on his behalf.
Chris G. Carlos, through the Ledlie Group of Atlanta, issued a statement Wednesday in which he says in the future he will consume less than the 440,000 gallons his October bill says he used.
Before I quote at length – because really, the details are that good – let me just interject to note that Carlos hired a PR company to issue a statement on his behalf. The man didn’t kill his wife, help OJ “retrieve” his memorabilia, or guard Brit’s body for a day. Oh, no. He “just” used a fuckload of water in the middle of a drought (Georgia’s worst in 168 years), so much so that the powers that be actually called him out on his eco-crimes. Kinda sorta, anyway. And apparently that warranted some professional spin. Clue numero uno that we’re got a rich fuckwit on our hands. I mean, who does that?
“I honestly didn’t realize the extent of my water use and regret I didn’t act sooner. I want to be a part of the solution to the water crisis,” Carlos said in the statement.
“I am going to take whatever steps are necessary to substantially reduce my water consumption. This includes seeking the advice and guidance of conservation professionals in exploring all possible water saving measures,” the statement said.
Bullshit:
Carlos was warned Oct. 1 about violating the outdoor watering ban and a letter followed Oct. 10, county water system officials said.
His use abated, but was still sizeable.
Ahem.
Just how insane is his water usage, you ask?
Carlos’ 14,000-square-foot home is on 3.8 lush acres in Atlanta Country Club and includes a pool. The 440,000 gallons he used in a month would fill the average backyard pool 58 times. [...]
For the six days through Tuesday, Cobb County Water System contractors have read Carlos’ meter each day. It shows water use of about 2,000 gallons daily, according to Cobb County spokesman Robert Quigley. The average Cobb household uses 217 gallons.
Carlos also was identified by the Cobb water system as its top user among September bills — at 339,000 gallons.
“It is frankly inconceivable to use that much water, regardless of the drought,” said Cobb Commission Chairman Sam Olens on Tuesday.
Carlos was warned Oct. 1 about violating the outdoor watering ban and a letter followed Oct. 10, county water system officials said.
His use abated, but was still sizeable.
Between early October and Nov. 7, he used 121,000 gallons, according to county records.
Instead of “apologizing” to God for our wastefulness, Sonnyboy should be out and about actually doing something about it. Like breaking Carlos’s kneecaps. Or cutting the douche’s water. Or both.
Think I’m being a wee bit harsh? Try watching an ep of The Colbert Report with Mr. Carlos, and see if he doesn’t just mistake Colbert Platinum as a legit segment. I’ve got 20 gallons of H2O that says he calls one of his eight houseservants in to TiVo it for him.
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Tagged: georgia drought sonny perdue governor perdue water conservation environment godbags prayer Chris G. Carlos assholes the colbert report colbert platinum first amendment
